gary
gary is an incredibly interesting guy that spends his days with dogs and his nights with experimental sound.
His dog "walking" business indognation consists of daily hikes with a pack of dogs, off leash. he trains them while doing so, working with the dog owners on their methods and general relationship with their pup. i can personally attest that my dog would not be the same without gary. on fridays late at night, he takes over the local radio station 103.3fm for his experimental music show: melody in mayhem. in the midst of it all lies a good man with a wonky sense of humor & a deeply self reflective nature.
he talks with us about his three passions in life: dogs, music, and his wife.
check out the full uncut interview audio above featuring a very squeaky chair, scroll through all the incredible pup pics (!), read the edited transcript below, or simply look out for our newsletter for the juicy bits.
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what is your story and your relation to asheville?
there are so many different ways to go with it. born in madison, wisconsin. the oldest of two boys....My father wanted me to be the proper grown young man, but i did nothing but rebel from the very beginning. i went to college, i got in a band. i went to university of wisconsin madison for two years and it was just too close to home, so i went to Milwaukee which gave me a taste of being independent. that is where i got into playing in bands, and i actually got into radio there too. but i found out how cutthroat the radio business is and i didn't want anything to do with it. i wound up with a bachelors in mass communication and doing post grad work in photography. i played music, went on tour, did a couple of records. the drummer tried to kill herself...that ended the band for a little while. but we got back together and i went to san francisco. i worked with music there more - with labels and distributors. i didn't play, i had a real love hate relationship with my guitar by the time my band ended, and so i just completely stayed away from it for years. when i lived in san francisco i always gravitated towards what i was passionate in, and it probably wasn't smart but i never really cared about the making money aspect. so i just volunteered, did things i wanted to do, and sometimes eventually it would turn out to make me money. but pretty much every job i have ever had was based on me volunteering and being an intern and then them hiring me. except for one job where i was the accountant for a porn distributor. i was only there for like three months.
i've been a fitness instructor, i've worked with nbc and the local affiliate in san francisco. what else have i done? i started with animal care and control in san francisco and that's where the dog thing came in. that was always a huge aspect to me, but when i moved to Milwaukee i wasn't responsible enough, i was still a kid. but i decided when i am grown and mature...once i get a dog i would never be without a dog and that has been the case. i worked with animal control which was the shelter there. i learned all about the animals that would be impounded, and it was everything from pot belly pigs to boa constrictors, there was a miniature horse that came in, people brought in rats they thought were pets but they were feral. i had to take care of them all, so i learned a TON which i loved but it was a really hard business. i had to do euthanasia, and you know when dogs have rabies, i don't know if it has changed now, but back then when a dog is suspected to have had rabies you cut the head off and send it off to the lab. so i would have to do that too. so, i had to get out. that's when i started the dog walking thing. it was before it was a big deal, and i didn't even have business cards and all of a sudden i'm walking half a dozen dogs in the neighborhood. it just kinda spawned from there.
because nobody was doing it, there weren't that many people that were bringing off leash dogs. it grew to the point where i was doing three groups a day that were 8-10 dogs. i was making six figures, but i was really unhappy from all the driving and all the stress...pared down i got certified as a behavior consultant. so if your dog pees in the house or is aggressive on the leash i can help with that.
so do you still consider it "dog walking?"
that's always been difficult. i mean dog walking isn't cutting it, it isn't as involved...what the dogs get out of it is the exercise but it's the training too. a lot of dogs that come to me are not familiar with being off leash, they haven't done it before, so i have to train them with that. so, i don't know what to call me...but that has always been the case.
so how did you end up in asheville?
i met my wife. i was mugged three times, twice in san francisco and once in Milwaukee -- so i was feeling a little uneasy about living, especially with the way i saw it change, and the divide becoming greater between the people that have and the people that don't. the last time i was mugged i was stabbed in the chest and they punctured a lung. my wife had a stalker. she was like, "i'm done. i don't care where we go, let's go."
...we picked asheville because at the time i knew asheville was going to start growing, and for the business i do it would probably be a good thing. it's also relatively liberal and independent thinking, it's beautiful here, and it's within a thousand miles of our families.
so you do the incredible dog thing, and then you have the show here at the radio.
right, fridays 11pm - 2am. i am also the genre director for experimental music, which is stuff that you don't hear on the radio ordinarily. it's difficult music - that sounds pretentious to say, but it's music that really is formless. it doesn't have a 4/4 beat. i love sound, so some of it is just sound or noise that is orchestrated...composed in certain ways. that has kind of been a tough road to get people interested but it's doing great now. it's been 8 years, and the show has been in the top ten of all the shows here. every now and then i'll get submissions from japan but mostly from the united states, people that have heard the show will send in cd's of their work. i'm starting to do interviews, just to challenge myself a little more.
how would you describe your family?
my direct family? i would say it's my wife and my dog. my wife and i met in san francisco, and she's quite a bit younger than me. at first it was a little awkward but now not at all. we have been married 13 years, we are doing great. she's a full time student at unca, her specialty is forensic psychology. she specializes in capital punishment cases.
what is one of your favorite experiences?
well, for my job that i have - dog walking, i was on the beach two or three times a day. oddly enough in san francisco from where i lived i could drive 15-20 minutes and be on a stretch of beach where no one would be - i would have it all to myself. and i would take my groups of dogs down there. the only reason was that every time it would rain the path leading down to the beach would wash away, so it was difficult for most people. they wouldn't want to do it. of course the dogs didn't have a problem, and i made my own path and got down there. we would have a huge expansive beach all to ourselves.
i loved the music part, that never really made me a lot of money and i still think that, along with dogs and drag racing, that's probably the biggest passion i have...i've never raced, it's expensive! i worked with a team, i volunteered for a year, traveled with them and they taught me to do stuff.
what is one surprising thing that you carry with you?
it's not too surprising. i have a necklace of one of the rottweilers that i owned, bella. she lived to be about 14, and had cancer four different times. the first time she got cancer one of her toes got cut off to deal with it so i had this necklace made of her paw print. i've had this with me for fifteen years.
what is your drink of choice?
just really into bubbly water these days! i'm suspicious of it though. it says "natural" but it doesn't tell us what's in there...
when you're working do you prefer quiet or noise?
when i'm with the dogs i don't talk. i don't need to, i don't need to guide them. it really helps, because when i do have to say something i think it carries a lot more weight. so i'm quiet. but yesterday's group, for example, was really rambunctious. they made a lot of noise, and that always really entertains me.
do you have a most used app on your phone? are you on your phone very much?
no. talk about love / hate relationships. i get really mad at it and take the weekends off from it sometimes.
do you have a guilty pleasure iphone app?
i have an app called "we croak" it's based on the premise that we all die. it has quotes that come up five times a day, and a lot of times the quotes are very life affirming. it's very much about, live your life to the fullest because there are no guarantees that you will be alive tomorrow, that sort of stuff. sometimes they are really macabre, sometimes there are poems. here one just came in while we were speaking: "i am of the nature to age. i have not gone beyond aging. i am the nature to sicken. i have not gone beyond sickness. i am the nature to die. i have not gone beyond dying. all that is mine, beloved and pleasing, will change, will become otherwise, will become separated from me." that's from buddha.
if you could spend 24 hours in the life of someone else, who would it be?
you know, i've evolved to the point where i am happy enough to be who i am. i don't think in terms of that, and i don't care to.
what is the best part of your day?
late night. usually when my wife goes to bed...that's when i do my creative stuff. when i do my music - write or play...it's my play time, the only time i get.
what is one thing that without fail will ruin your day?
if i couldn't get outside i would be a wreck. i wouldn't be happy.
what is one thing that can turn around your day?
decent driving. good traffic.
what trait do you dislike in yourself?
lack of discipline...laziness. somehow i think i'm lazy.
what trait do you dislike in others?
self indulgence. people that don't listen, people that really just want to talk to you so they can tell you about themselves.
and not turning on their turn signal. not yielding.
what are you learning or working on right now?
well, garage band. the whole music thing is passion that has burned pretty bright throughout my entire life, and even though i haven't done much with it, this is a venture in seeing if i can form a better relationship with making music than i did before. i had certain ideas of what being successful with music was. and because i didn't get it, i was really unhappy.
what is asheville to you?
asheville is not as liberal as they think it is. but, considering i have lived most of my life in big cities, it's amazing to me that people are as friendly and you can live here as safely, at least for now. i feel so much more relaxed here. i didn't know how stressed, anxious, or uptight i was constantly living in san francisco until i got here and had time to unwind and just be able to live my life more like i want to...here. there are a ton of great things in san francisco but there are so many other things that i had to do to stay there.
it's easier to live here, and it's just easier for me to be me here.
what do you think the direction of asheville is?
well it's going to get bigger. it's going to get more crime riddled. it's going to lose some of it's outward personality. at the same time, i think there is going to be more culture here. that's one thing that is kind of lacking to me is the multidimensional culture...
little things like my radio show, i think, help. there is somebody performing here that is doing a nationwide tour, and i'd like to think that's because i've given him a lot of attention on this show...so people that are doing that kind of thing will bring other artists in and expose asheville residents to things that maybe they haven't seen or heard before. i think that's a good thing that will come with growth. but there will be a higher cost...all the way around...i know. but you know, i've been through it with madison, and it's just the way of the world. asheville is not an exception.
what do you think asheville is missing?
the multicultural aspect to it. i would love to see more of a modern art gallery here. i miss some of the museums in san francisco immensely.
do you have any go to haunts or favorite places?
haven't found that here, no. i used to have a ledge i would go to in san francisco i could walk and bring my dogs and sit high up on the top of the canyon and watch the traffic go up and down. once i met my wife, it became something the two of us would do on fridays on the end of our work week - hang out and talk and watch things.
i really like the smoky park supper club, that is the place i feel comfortable with either inside or outside.
do you have a go to outfit?
i am lacking in that terribly. i don't. i just put on whatever is on the top of the stack of clothes.
i get the new york times on sunday and i look through the fashion magazine, especially the men's one, and think "i gotta start cleaning up my game" and all i end up doing is buying shoes....i really want a sweater with a killer whale on it. but yeah, it's shoes. i have more shoes than my wife does.
what is one thing thats abnormally special to you?
there's a painting i have in the house, it's more of a photograph, of wwi military tanks. it's hand painted. the only reason that it's important to me is because my wife hates it and she doesn't want it up.
i've actually had a ton of things like that, and because i feel like i went overboard with it i've been learning to let go. i still have a record collection, i've got probably 10,000 vinyl lp's and maybe close to that with cd's and things too. i was thinking about that last night, "will i ever get to the point where i let go of that stuff?" and i'm not close to it. i have records in there i bought when i was 12.
what would you say is undeniably you?
i gravitate towards things i am interested in, and i don't have a plan. i just do it because i want to do it, and i don't think about things past that. i've learned that, i guess just by doing it and not thinking so much about it, that i'll be okay. i'll make it. and i always have.
in a book about your life thus far what would three of the chapters be?
1. extracaiting myself from the family. especially my dad. we fought so much, argued constantly because he had such a clear idea of what he wanted me to become and of course that was the exact opposite of what i did. so that took a lot of time to deal with.
2. probably me learning that i can talk, and it's ok. i wouldn't talk at all, i was teased a lot in middle school and that just shut me up. all through high school i was really quiet, and then my mother died when i was 16/17 so i really went into my own little world and was extremely nervous dealing with people at all. it was moving out to Milwaukee where i started to explore who i was outwardly.
3. the creative aspect of me - which is still an unknown, because i don't know if i am any good at anything. i was good when i played guitar regularly, i know that. but as far as creating, i don't know if i'm good at creating. so that's what this third part will be about.
what traits do you rate highest in others?
probably the same boring thing as anyone else. sincerity, openness, lack of pretense. self deprication - humor is huge to me. people that can laugh at my messed up jokes or have thier own quirky sense of humor.
what is your favorite curse word?
depends on the situation, don't you think? maybe fuck. that makes the point when you need it to.
...i was brought up to believe that you cannot say dick, because that had negative connotations towards women...asshole is gender free. and we are talking about things that people have in a derogatory way, so why just have a part of a man be this word that's used for everything?
i like the idea that cunt is being used more, it takes the power away - it takes the stigma away.
i think making something up - the first thing that comes to mind, it's an old one, but dickwad. to make something up at the spur of the moment depending on your mood and how angry you are.
who was your greatest mentor?
my teacher in fifth grade. when i was in fourth grade i feared having his class because he was a pretty strict disciplinarian. it was back in the day when you could slap kids around a bit too, and so he had quite the reputation for that. and i did indeed, a few times, have his hand print on the side of my face. but i think, maybe out of fear, i eventually started paying attention and being less of a jerk in class. he really supported me in doing that, and we became really good friends...he basically saved my life once in high school. he would buy really fancy cars and he would just give me the keys to take it for a spin. i think that was really instrumental for me.
if there was a new two dollar bill, whose face should be on it?
do you know the band die antwoord? one of them.
...but they aren't american. so then, snoop dog.
how are you contributing?
small little ways like this radio show, and with my dogs. i know that i've helped a ton of dogs lives, and i've helped people's lives with their relationship with their dogs. that's the best part. the money i need, but that means more to me. i think that's why i have been doing this for as long as i have. people and dogs are generally happy to see me, and you can't say that about a lot of jobs.
what is one thing that always makes you cringe?
squeaky green beans. food that squeaks.
when you're pushed to your limit how do you cope?
i have a hard time. i keep wanting to go pedal to the medal.
what is the magic of your job?
you know, no matter what you do for a living, no matter how fun it is there are times where it becomes a job. there are just those days. but then, there are other days when it is like magic. everything goes just unpredictibly right. you never would have imagined it, but then you are in the middle of it, and then you just tell yourself - this is really special. whether it's just the combination of the dogs and their temperament that day, and the sky or the wind, you know? there will be these times where i just have to tell my wife -- this was really cool today.
how do you get your news?
i have this app, i think "read across the aisle"? it lists 16-20 news sources from most progressive to most conservative...and depending on how much time you spend on the app the line on the bottom will lean towards the blue or the red. so purposely i will spend time with the wall street journal or fox news because i want to prove to myself how open minded i am.
what mundane activity makes you uneasy?
i would dispense of sleep if i could.
or getting up. i hate when my alarm goes off. when i'm coming to consciousness and awareness.
what mundane activity do you love?
having a least an hour for reading in bed before turning out the light.
what do you need around you? what brings you happiness?
that's changed. the music of course, but if i had to choose between my wife and music it would be my wife. it's odd that i have such a good relationship with her. both of us were considered by our friends to be the least likely to get married, we are both independent and didn't have good parents to teach us, and the age difference and everything. but it's the most important thing...i'm lucky.
what are you proud of?
i'm proud that i'm still living.
i'm proud that i've been able to sustain this marriage in such a good way.
i'm proud of the fact that i keep doing new things.
what do you dream about?
i'm a superhero sometimes. i save people.
what are you scared of?
dying. i'm not ready for that. i will never be ready for that.
do you have a hunch of how you will die?
i'll probably die fast. that's my guess.
is there anything you want to accomplish before that?
i want to make one piece of music that i'm proud of. i want to get to better terms with making music again.